Nursery and things...



Instead of pictures of the nursery, I decided to re-aquaint myself with our FLIP video camera, so I will know how to use when Baby Franks arrives. Hope this works and hope you like!

37 and some change...

I am 37 weeks and a few days...A big milestone because 37 weeks is considered term. I would feel completely comfortable if Baby Franks decided to enter the world. 3 weeks seems so far away so I have been having daily discussions with Baby Franks about all the reasons they should decide to meet us. I have mentioned that Mark and I are nice people, we have lots of fun baby things for it to use, we want to know whether we can call "he" or "she" instead of "it" or other nicknames we and others have used, we have a very annoying nice dog who wants to know what the heck is going on around here, football season here and we know you will love it, mommy's clothes are starting to get really tight, you have 6 cousins to meet...etc etc...But NO, Baby Franks does not like any of those reasons currently and trying to reason with an unborn baby is making me look like a crazy lady. I know little one will arrive when they are ready and we just need to be patient, but it is HARD! I am praying for patience everyday, it is not something I am good at. I have been feeling fairly good, slowing down a lot, spurts of extreme exhaustion, then energy, spurts of extreme happiness and then extreme meltdowns (I am hoping this is normal!)I truly have no reason to complain so I will leave it at that. Hopefully I will have time to post some nursery pictures this week!

30 weeks

34 weeks

Here I am at 37 weeks in all my glory! Sorry my bed isn't made!

35 weeks

Celebrating 35 weeks....Another good milestone! 5 weeks or less (hopefully) until we get to meet this little alien. I am ready to put a face and name to Baby Franklin. The good news is that Baby Franks flipped and is officially HEAD DOWN! I am so thrilled about this...I did not want a csection and even though it is still an option it is not the only option. I have been alright. I have definitely slowed down a LOT! I had a slight setback this week with come contractions and other issues, which sent me home from work and some "mini bedrest" for the weekend. So I am taking it easy which is extremely difficult for me. I want to be up and about and doing what I need to, but I guess I have no control at this point! Pretty much all the stuff is done for baby, we are waiting for curtains, but that is it. We need to put the car seat in and I guess pack a hospital bag, but that is not really stressing me out. I feel as ready as I will be. Now it is a waiting game, hopefully not in bed for the next couple of weeks.  Oh yea and I start school on Monday...Just one class...but looking at the syllabus is a bit overwhelming. Ill figure it out and get through it. Looks like quite a bit of reading so hopefully I will be able to keep my eyes open and get it done. So there is the update...not much going on. Mark is good...spending any free moment on the golf course...I think he knows those trips will be a bit less in a few weeks.  Alright Happy Friday!

Baby Franklin's Shower

A few weeks ago was my baby shower in Columbus hosted by my wonderful mother. My mom went above and beyond to make Mark and I and Baby Franklin feel so special= she is so good at that! We all had a great time and we got lots of "needed" things for Baby Franks. One of the best parts was that my sister Mary Beth drove in from New Jersey. We don't get to see each other all that often so it meant so much she was there...I wish she was closer...selfishly she has no idea how much I could use her here! We had a great time! Overall, I left feeling excited for our new addition. I felt extremely humbled by the generosity of our family and friends. Thank you everyone for helping us celebrate Baby Franklin!

Fun Decoration

Signature Carol (my mom)

Dolls I played with when I was little

Diaper Cake

Beautiful Flowers

Cake- it was delicious!

My sister MB hard at work!

Opening presents!

My flower girl Belle= ADORABLE

Loved this piggy bank!

In love with this diaper bag from Mary Beth

My favorite tiny cousin Brody

Finally a bump picture! It is not much so hope no one is disappointed! This is at 30 weeks!

Why My Job Really Sucks Sometimes...

Everyone knows I work in the Newborn ICU, but a lot of people do not realize how the job can be sometimes. A lot of people think we hold and feed babies all day. Yes, there are some days you hold babies and feed babies most of the day, but no one realizes sometimes feeding babies is like feeding a rock..our tiny babies do not like to eat at first and it can be frustrating. Some days or weeks go by and I do not even hold one baby because they are too sick to hold. Yes, I have gone a couple weeks without holding a baby at my job and when I finally do I realize how wonderful it really is and how hard it is to take care of sick kids.

This has been on my mind a lot lately as currently our unit is busy and has a lot of sad things happen. It might also have to do with that fact that if I wouldn't have miscarried back in November, our first baby would be here or the fact that our second baby will be here in a few short weeks and I might be slightly panicking inside. People think that since I take care of babies all day  I will know exactly what to do, and yes I know how to change a diaper, hold a baby, clothe a baby etc...but I have no idea HOW to be a mom, I have no idea how I will be with MY OWN child, and that scares me. I have visions of what I will be like, but they could totally change and they could be unrealistic or it could happen as I have imagined...fear of the unknown is not one of my strong points. I am already thinking about how it will be when I am pregnant for the 3rd time...how will it be different, will I miscarry again? My biggest fear is to have to go through that again. A friend recently miscarried and as I was listening to her story it stirred up so many emotions. I listened to the pain in her voice and saw the tears as she just said " I wanted THAT baby, I'm sure I can get pregnant again, but I wanted THAT one, why couldn't I have THAT one?" It made me cringe and want to vomit, remembering those feelings. I felt so much empathy for her, but did a terrible job of conveying it. I came home thinking of my own loss and how I felt the exact same way.

Following all of that, I had probably one of the worst days of my life at work. A micro preemie, who had been in our nursery forever was doing very well, taking bottles, getting ready to move into an open crib and on his way out the door. Baby's mom came in for the 2:30 feeding and left...the RN taking care of that baby hooked up the baby's feed at 5:30, at 6:00pm the baby dropped his heart rate and we never got it back...We performed CPR on that baby for almost 45 minutes, we never got it back and the baby died...before the parents could get there. Not only was it s stressful code trying everything we could for this baby, the baby died in the nurses arms, and the parents had to walk in and see their baby had not made it. We do not know why this baby died and I'm not sure we ever will, but  to hear the parents grief was more then I could handle as I rubbed my own baby belly...I just could never imagine that situation and here I am living it with another family...it was cruel...Selfishly I thought about our baby and what Mark and I would do and I wanted to curl up and shut my mind off.  But you have to keep going on at your job, the worst part is walking out of the hospital to go and see that the world just goes on no matter what...something I will never understand. Seeing stuff like this at work makes my job suck a lot sometimes. It makes it hard to go back. The only comfort is the support of the other nurses and having faith there is a reason for all of this, but it is hard. I am ready to go back and snuggle with a tiny 5 pounder and I think I am ready to snuggle my own sure to be ginormous baby. Thanks for letting me vent!

32 weeks....Holy...

Crapola! 8 months pregnant?! I had a hard time imagining I would ever get to this point, now that I have I laugh at what I thought it would be like vs what it actually is like! I thought I would have this BIG beautiful preggo belly, thought it would look like I shoved a basketball up my shirt (maybe I did that when I was younger, I dont know just sayin) , thought I would have this pregnant glow that so many women I know had, thought my nursery would done, everything neatly in its place, clothes washed, pictures hung, car seat installed... now all I can say to that is HA! My basketball belly is more like a tiny little belly that sits more out to the sides then out front, depending on what shirt I am wearing, sometimes I still am not looking all that pregnant. I'm not comlaining, just stating the truth vs reality. My nursery has dropcloths over the furniture because we are still working on painting, all the things from my shower our shoved in a closet, nothing has been washed, I have no idea what I am going to hang on the walls and you know what I am still smiling. All of that is in the process of getting done, so I am not anxious about any of that. I am definatley " feeling more pregnant" ie harder to breathe, bend over, my back hurts, sleeping is not fun etc...but overall I feel great...I feel like I am just moving right along...Love feeling every kick, punch, hiccup, tumble and/or whatever else that little alien is doing in there! Im waiting on some pics from dad and will post a belly shot soon as well as a post from my shower in Columbus!

The only semi-negative thing on brain right now is the baby's position. At my OB appointment, they can't tell where the baby's head is. They think they can feel the butt/back but don't know if baby is head down or laying transverse or across my abdomen. This might explain why my bump is much wider then out...I am feeling movement all across my abdomen and not too much down low. So they are going to give me another 2 weeks, try and see if they can feel the head at my next apt, if not then do a quick ultra sound and see what is going on. If baby is head down GREAT, if not, we have to talk about options, but I am not going there yet... In the meantime between the girls at work and my ever important google research here is what I am doing to get baby to be head down...
- Girls at work our talking to the baby
- Mark is talking more to baby
- Shining a flashlight on my lower abdomen( I guess they migrate towards the light)
- Putting earphones or music down there.
- Tilting my pelvis a certain way
- Taking a megaphone and talking to the baby down there :) (kidding)
Any other helpful hints? Really praying this baby is not breech or transverse! Come on baby Franklin!!!

This made me smile

I found this blog post in a new blog I am stalking...yes I have issues. It made me smile and look forward to coming months. Here is the LINK ! Enjoy all my preggo friends and mommy's out there!

27 weeks and thoughts....

It's hard to believe I am sitting here at 27 weeks, some sources tell me this is the beginning of the 3rd trimester others say it will be next week, but either way I am in the home stretch. It does not feel like it since I still technically have 13 more weeks. BUT it is something to celebrate. The farther I get the farther away from the "danger zone"  I get, which only makes me relax. But in all my craziness and anxiety the 3rd trimester opens up a whole new set of thoughts, questions, and anxieties. I am worrying less about having a pre-term baby and more about my new role as a mom. A million thoughts trickle through my mind on a daily basis and I am starting to write them down in a journal so I can share them with my kid one day. Another post on that later, when I can sort through them a bit.

As for the pregnancy I feel pretty good, I really have no reason to complain. People have started to notice my belly, I must admit it is still pretty small, I still feel like I just look like I have eaten to much food or need to buy a bigger shirt. I was shopping for some clothes and at the store they have one of those "fake bumps" to try on with clothes. The one in my dressing room was 7 months, I chuckled to myself because the bump was BIG and then I looked down at myself and laughed. The fake "perfect" bump looked NOTHING like my bump. I felt sad for a few minutes that I don't have the "bump" I have envisioned but then snapped out of it because 1) I'm sure that bump will be here eventually 2) I love MY bump, because MY bump is MY baby. I gave a little squeeze to my belly and told my baby to keep on growing the way it wants to (as long as that is healthy of course)

I may not look that big, but I have noticed some major changes over the past couple weeks. I can't move around the way I used to or the way I want too. I am not comfortable sitting straight up, I get out of breath so easy, literally going up the stairs or walking fast. Sleeping has not been fun, I am propping up on pillows, still trying to sleep on my stomach and waking up with all sorts of aches in my back. And as soon as I get comfortable, I have to PEE...it is so frustrating. I pee 3-4 times a night, which I'm sure will only get worse. BUT if that is the worst of my complaints, I think I will survive. Baby Franks is moving all over the place, it loves my left side and my bladder. I can see it moving on the outside, slightly creeping, but mostly amazing
    I had my glucose test this morning to check fro gestational diabetes, I will find out next week if I "passed" I go to the OB for my 28 week appointment and then I start going every 2 weeks...CRAZY! We have a lot to do, but have some plans on how we are going to get it all done. It is not stressing me out either, it will get done. I am getting excited to start getting everything in order.

So there is the update for the past couple of weeks...we are moving right along!!

A Month of Firsts...

I turn 24 weeks this week. Man how time flies. 24 weeks is a huge milestone to some, but to a NICU nurse 24 is the WORST time..haha! This is because we deliver 24 week babies and they are considered viable, we save their tiny little lives regardless of the long term outcomes. All I know is that my little baby better stay nice and cozy inside because I can't imagine having a 24 weeker....And it looks like thats the way it is going to be...staying cozy and warm. I had my 24 week appointment today and everything checked out great. Heartbeat was strong, baby was moving, my uterus was measuring on track...all great signs. I am officially up 9.5 lbs, my belly is growing! Even though my OB asked me if anyone knew I was pregnant because he couldn't tell...very sweet, BUT I have a belly that is sprouting out! It is weird to see your body grow, but it has been fun feeling moving and starting to see kicks from the outside this past week. I really have no complaints on how I feel, I have energy and no strange symptoms, the bloody noses have stopped (YEA!!), the bad taste in my mouth comes and go, but I have nothing to complain about! It has been a busy month and Baby Franklin has experienced a lot of "firsts" this month. Here is the list:

1. 1st car accident
2. 1st plane ride
3. 1st trip to New Jersey
4. 1st trip to the Indy 500 (please if you are a girl, don't act like some of those girls down there or drink as much as your mother has there!!!)
5. 1st actual mom freakout= I was convinced you were not okay for some reason, I dopplered at work and still had to go see the OBGYN to make sure you were okay, You were not moving the way you normally do and that is NOT ok in my book. You are not allowed to rest...and if you do you must twitch every so often so I know you are ok. I swear the nurses at the OB's office are sick of me!
6. 1st week of all maternity pants after losing a button on one pair and walking around with my zipper down on another pair...it was time to give it up!
7. First blog entry from your dad. Mark decided to start his own blog for our baby. Mark has not said much about his thoughts and feelings as a dad during this pregnancy and I think it was getting to him. This is a great way for him to get out his anxieties, dreams and hopes. The first entry SHOCKED me. You think you know your husband, but it was great to read his thoughts. He is amazing! Here is  Mark's Blog

I think that was it and I think that is enough for one month (actually 2 weeks) It has been a good start...only 16 more weeks to go (hopefully like 14 which means you will want to come at 38 weeks which will be ok with me!!) That's all I got!!!

Weekend Recap and Some Random Thoughts

I had a great time in New Jersey with sister Mar Beth and brother in law Brian. Despite some minor flying issues, I managed to get there only a few hours late it was a relaxing weekend and just what I needed. I got some QT with my sister, we talked a lot about baby, did some baby shopping and registering. She caught me up to date with the latest in their life and it was nice to see her little life she has created with Brian. I also got to see my uncle, cousin and 95 year old grandma. My sweet old grandma was cracking me up, she had her hair done, her lipstick on and was ready for some company. She recently got a motorized wheelchair, but is refusing to use it. Brian and I had no problem testing it out, after running into numerous things in her house and crying because I was laughing so hard, Granny was getting mad so we had to put it away. We had a nice lunch and then story time began. Granny told me every story she could think of...I just held her hand and listened. She is the sweetest old lady and is just lonely. Makes me miss her bunches, but I know she is in good hands with her Polish caretaker and family around her. I couldn't help but think of my child sitting there with my mother in 20 years...it will go fast.  I had a great time with Mary Beth, I miss her and can't wait to see her in July.

Now I am home, Mark is gone on business for a little bit and I have a few days off. I have a made a to do list a mile long, but yet I sit here blogging. None of the stuff is urgent, except my research homework, but I did most of it yesterday. I looked at my calendar and I only have like 5 free 2 day weekends left until the baby comes. Not very much time, for the amount of things I have to be doing. We are planning on looking at cribs next week...most people probably are cringing that I haven't ordered my crib yet, but Im not worried about it. It will all get done, as long as I don't go on bedrest I'll be good. I have not had the desire to get started on the room yet or anything else, because in my head, my baby is not even viable yet. I mean, if I had the baby today, it would not survive and coming home to a nursery would be miserable. I know that is grim and dim but it is the truth. Oh the joys of working in the NICU. When it comes down to it, I am scared...scared something will happen to this baby, something I can't control. If this was my first pregnancy I wonder if I would feel this way?! I wish I could be naive and not know what it feels like, but I am not. I am scared...I want this baby...I want it be healthy...I want a chubby little monster to take home....but I am not guaranteed that yet...I know there are still risks after the 24 week mark, the only way I will be able to relax is when that baby is in my arms. So does it really matter if my nursery is perfect and complete? Not in my mind it doesn't. I am enjoying this pregnancy, I am enjoying being pregnant, but it is a cautious feeling that only people that have had miscarriages can understand. I am bonding with this baby in my own way, but it has nothing to do with buying things for the baby...that is the least important thing for me right now.  So hang in there with me friends, Im sorry if I'm stressing you out, or seem heartless, or whatever your thoughts of me are. Mark and I will figure this out...We have it under control. We are creating our family and I love how we are doing it. Alright off to check some things off my list...

And Breathe....

It has been a crazy busy week and half...this is the first chance I have had to sit down and think about something else other then what I have to do next...busy busy busy! I'm sitting here with some morning coffee (sorry baby) and it feels so good to not have to race out the door! A brief recap....My car is on the shop after being hit the other morning by someone, Mark's car died, dead that was it after 190,000 miles, we went car shopping, bought a new car, had to take Bailey to the vet, found out she is hypothyroid and needs to go on some medicine, my car in the shop needs a little extra work done, Mark refused to turn the air on so we were camping out in the basement, I worked the weekend, and started my summer research class! Ok maybe it doesnt sound that busy, but making adult decisions (ie car) takes a lot out of me. I know life is only going to get worse in the coming months especially after our little one gets here. Anyways it feels good to just have a relaxing morning, love my morning alone time.

Meanwhile, I have reached the 21 week mark in my pregnancy, that means the count down is in the teens!! Whoo HOO! I am feeling pretty good I can't complain. The biggest change is the amount of movement I have been feeling...this kid is turning circles inside of me. It has been punching my insides...it feels so weird! Mark actually got to feel the baby kick this week for the first time... I would like to report it was this magical moment but all Mark said was "wow what's that little f*&ker doing in there?" Seriously babe? Thats all you can say?! I just laughed because that is Mark and I shouldn't expect anything less! I am starting to get a tiny bump, have to wear tighter shirts in order to see it, but it is there. All anyone asks me is "when are you going to start showing?!" I want to punch them, because I have no control over my long torso and baby bump! (HORMONES!) But I love my little bump even if Im the only one who can see it.

How far along: 21

Total weight gain/loss: + 5lbs ( Haven't weighed since my last MD appointment)
Maternity clothes: Still awkward stage, wearing mainly my one pair of maternity jeans, sweats and scrubs. Wore a few maternity tops, make me look a little more preggers
Stretch marks?: No...covering my body in Mamma Bee's oil lotion every night. But this cellulite can GO AWAY
Sleep: Still no complaints, waking up to pee a MILLION times, still sleeping on my tummy, will miss this!
Best moment this week: Mark feeling baby kick, buying a new car
Movement: Kicks, punches and circles
Food cravings: Coke, don't know where this came from, but it tastes so good!
Gender: Surprise!!! My gut still says girl!
What I miss: Not having issues with my clothes...Im used to everything fitting great! I still miss the ability to stay up late ( well past 9pm to be able to get some stuff done around here. And with this warmer weather I missed having a beer on my back porch!

Milestones: Countdown is into the teens! 19 weeks left!

Baby is the size of a Banana...mmmm!

Weeks 18 & 19

It has been a busy two weeks as my previous posts have detailed. With the passing of our anatomy scan and the reassurance of a healthy baby it has been a good couple of weeks. I am feeling pretty good. Really just being tired is my only symptom, but maybe Im milking it a bit?! Who knows BUT I am being way more productive then I have been, so I am thankful for that.

How far along: 19


Total weight gain/loss: + 5lbs

Maternity clothes: In a totally akward stage...My clothes make me look super chuppy, maternity clothes don't fit quite right...living in sweatpants
Stretch marks?: No...covering my body in Mamma Bee's oil lotion every night.

Sleep: Can't complain minus the peeing part. I am currently getting up about 4 times per night to pee...AHH!


Best moment this week: Anatomy Ultra Sound
Movement: No strong kicks yet, but feeling pretty consistent flutters. I LOVE it.
Food cravings: Still drinking my orange juice and started on some rasberry lemonade. Living on cereal!
Gender: We did not find out...Im still convinced it is a girl. Mark thinks boy.


What I miss: Not having issues with my clothes...Im used to everything fitting great! I still miss the ability to stay up late ( well past 9pm to be able to get some stuff done around here.

Milestones: I guess feeling movement!

Baby is the size of a Mango. Our baby weighed in at 9 oz!

We Survived

Well...we made it!!! We survived our ultra sound...it was wonderful! I loved seeing baby again...my oh my how it has grown since last time. Mark was in shock about how different it looked from our 10 week one. I must start out by saying that I planned on waking up early showering and getting ready for our big day...well I overslept, my hair was slightly wet, I manage to put some cover up on my every increasing acne since pregnancy and get out the door to only be 5 minutes late to the appointment. I was rushed and anxious and not how I wanted to start the day. Then we got a different ultra sound tech then last time, this was ok...she was nice, but  not overly friendly and as Mark put it " She was all about her J O B!" So I felt like she was kind of rushing through things and semi insensitive to the fact that we were unsure about wanting to find out or not. I explained I was a NICU nurse and I wanted her to slow down and explain everything she was doing...she did, but I wasn't impressed. I guess I need to get over that because our baby is HEALTHY! 10 fingers, 10 toes, 4 chamber heart, closed spinal cord, closed abdominal wall, no cleft lip and intact brain. How amazing is that?! Thank God for a healthy baby. We eventually decided we did not want to find the sex, the tech assured those downstairs parts looked normal and that was good enough for us. So we are still Team Green. We did get a look at the genitals but we had no idea what we were looking at, I really couldn't tell...DANG! haha! SO it is over, we have a healthy baby, and we survived the temptation. Loved watching Mark through all of this, he was so sweet, just looking in amazement...He is going to be such a good dad! So now it is time to move on to the next step, which I don't even know what that is, but Im working on figuring that out. Thanks for listening to my anxieties over the past 2 days! I can't believe I am really pregnant....lets get this show on the road!!!



Baby's Face, hand up by the mouth (that is not it's penis mom!) Two eyes and an adorable Bajorek Polish Nose



Non 3-D, profile, sticking it's gorilla lips out (thanks Franklin's) curled in a ball, can see the spine!

Week 16 and 17

This week I started my 17th week...crazy to think! Week 16 and 17 were nothin too much to speak of. I have been feeling pretty good, having some more energy, and starting to think about all I have to do in the upcoming weeks. I kind of feel like I am in holding pattern, I feel it is to early to start doing anything for the nursery (not that I have a clue what I want to do!) I just feel stuck...So Im reminding myself that I need to just relax and enjoy this part of my pregnancy. I have not felt any movement yet, Im still saying it is gas bubbles...I want a hard kick..unrealistic I know, but I want to know for sure! I am still wearing my regular clothes, sometimes at night unbuttoning the top button. I feel like I have a little pooch, but Mark thinks I am making it up. My next ultra sound is in a couple of weeks, it is the anatomy scan...we are planning on not finding out if it is a boy or girl! Im looking forward to the end surprise, but I must admit...it is getting harder and harder...I know I will be tempted to find out at my appointment, but I have to keep the end prize in mind...a wonderful surprise moment! Im secretly hoping that I will get a shot of the baby's "parts" haha...Im think I will have better luck with that if it is a boy...Speaking of boys....Is it bad to admit that I want a boy?! Don't get me wrong, I want the baby to be healthy blah blah blah, but Mark and I both want a boy. The weird thing is that my deep down gut feeling says it is a girl. It will take probably a little time to get used to the idea of a girl, but Im sure it wont be long. I know I will not be disappointed either way, Im just being honest! Well there is my little recap, nothing too exciting just some random pregnant thoughts!  Baby is the size of onion, but doing so many amazing things...I'm looking forward to the weeks ahead!

First Trimester Recap

Since I was in no mood to journal during my first trimester I decided to write a mini recap so at least I will have something to look back on (does this make me a bad mother already?!)

January 9...First positive pregnancy test...5:30 am before I went to work. I have no idea what made me decide to take one, but I did and it was positive. I turned the light on at 5:30 and said "Welp, I am pregnant" Mark answered slightly annoyed " Really, let me see" He was not convinced it was a positive test ( It had lines not the digital) He claimed he had to see the word pregnant to believe it. So off to work I went, stopping by Kroger, buying 4 more pregnancy tests. I went to work and used two of them...The word pregnant popped up... (insert smiley face here!!) I text Mark a picture of the test and it wasn't until I got home that night did he actually start believing it, as I peed on every pregnancy test I could get my hands on. What a wonderful memory I have of this evening...We were thrilled.

January 11...Called my OBGYN....long story short I had an early loss in November so  I was slightly worried that maybe something else besides pregnancy. When I talked to my OB he informed it was possible I could be pregnant already and wanted me to come in and have my beta levels drawn to see what was going on. So in I went for blood work, told the lab at my work it was STAT and within an hour I got the results...289= pregnant. I wanted to scream. The real test is if the the beta levels double within 48 hrs, that means that things are progressing normally. My beta levels with my miscarriage were never over 100, anything less then 5 means you are not pregnant, but the doubling is what they look for..

January 15...Saturday, we were headed to Cincinnati for my nephew Evan's birthday party, I knew I had to get to the lab and get my results so I could rest assured (I am nuts, I know) So Mark took me early in the am and once again I put a STAT order on the results. A couple hours later I was staring a 723...more then doubled...we were headed in the right direction. I can't explain the relief I felt, knowing that it was a pregnancy and not something from my miscarriage....off to Cincy we went and decided to just tell my family...we wanted to tell face to face and we wanted everyone to be able to be happy with us. My family was such a support during the rough time in November, we just wanted to be happy. Our family was thrilled to say the least! The next step with the OBGYN was to come in an early ultra sound to confirm everything...

January 27...First appointment at 6 weeks...I was so anxious for this,  I was convinced something would be wrong....Mark wanted to shoot me I was so nervous. So we go in the appointment and I am shaking. He starts to do the ultra sound...confirms the pregnancy and says if I would hold still we should be able to see the heart beat...Mark had to hold my legs still...HOT I know...and there it was a tiny circle, with a fast flicker...our babies heart beating...one of the most amazing moments in our relationship.

January 27- February 28th: weeks 6 through 10...lots of sleeping, lots of anxiety, lots of nausea, a little vomiting, a lot of terrible tastes in my mouth, a lot of sleeping, a lot of just feeling like crap. My worst time was in the evening, about 5pm on, I was done..just wanted to go to bed..was nausea and had terrible metal mouth...blah! I survived, it could have been worse I know, but not fun at any point!

February 28th- 10 week appointment, first "official appointment". We got to hear the heartbeat at this appointment. At first he just wanted to Doppler me, but I demanded another ultra sound...I'm crazy I told you. So we got to see baby, how different it looked from 6 weeks, see and hear the heartbeat...overall an awesome appointment. I did not cry...which was so surprising to me, I just sat and looked...Mark was so excited! Got my blood work, everything checked out fine.

Feb 28 through March 15- weeks 10-12...pretty boring, lots of sleep, lots of night time bloating, lots of bad tastes in my mouth.

March 15- We opted to do the First Trimester screening for down syndrome and other birth defects...blood work and an ultra sound. I went by myself, thinking this would be no big deal, Mark wouldn't miss much. Boy was I wrong...this is when I officially fell in love. I was told to drink a little caffeine or sugar before going in to help make the baby move, after chugging 16 ounces of orange juice, baby was doing circles...sorry baby. It was moving around, staring right at us, heart beating..all I know is that is was amaazing. I can't explain it...this is when I first cried and thought "I love you" ...I wish Mark would have been there!!

That pretty much sums up the first trimester. It was a lot of doctor's appointments, a lot of anxiety and a lot of orange juice! I survived and now onto the 2nd trimester...which I have heard it fabulous!

15 Week Appointment

I had my 15 week appointment last Friday...everything went well. I met with another OBGYN in the practice and that was something different for me. I don't do well with change...haha. The biggest change is that she is a woman and my usual doctor is a male...such a difference! Females are so much more sensitive and willing to listen...it caught me off guard! Im used to my male in and out...answers my questions matter of fact and tells me to just fricken relax (pretty much sums it up!) It was a nice change of pace, but will be looking forward to my regular OB next time. Appointment was pretty boring, weight check, vitals, pee on your hand in a cup  and listen to the heartbeat...which is always exciting...except for the fact that 2 days prior my friend and I at work snuck down to triage and asked to borrow their doppler. We preceded to doppler each other...with not much success...had to call another nurse who knew what she was doing and then finally we found them...ahhh beautiful little heartbeats. Such a fun experience! Here is a little synopsis of week 15...sorry no pictures yet, we are just not into taking them, maybe this week!

How far along: 15
Total weight gain/loss: + 4lbs
Maternity clothes: umm no...at night time extremely bloated. Have worn them, but mainly just unbutton top button.
Stretch marks?: No...covering my body in Mamma Bee's oil lotion every night.
Sleep: Pretty good...could be worse!

Best moment this week: Triage heartbeat fiasco...haha!
Movement:  Not yet, swore I felt something about a week ago, but probably too early
Food cravings: Still orange juice and any kinda of fruit...heaven!
Gender: Still planning on not finding out. Im still convinced it is a girl.

What I miss: Wine (is that bad?) Being able to stay up late without being miserable, energy
Milestones: Nothing yet I think... Baby is the size of an orange!

It's Official...

I am PREGNANT!!! I officially got outed at work this week in the lunch room and since that day numerous people at work have approached me saying they have heard the good news...So I figured the last place to announce it was my blog. I turned 14 weeks this past Friday and it is such a relief to say that I am in my second trimester. It has been a long couple months with a roller coaster of emotions, but I must say I am just truly filled with joy and excitement.  I am due September 23, a perfect fall baby...my favorite time of the year...LOVE IT! Some you may be wondering what I am going to do about school and my response to you is that I'm just going to do it...I will have 2 online classes on maternity and people may think that's crazy, but I will just figure it out. I will get it done, it may not be perfect but taking a semester off is not an option. So that is that!

Now onto a few details...I found out I was pregnant in early January I was probably only about 4 weeks...Mark and I were thrilled. Had an early ultra sound at 6 weeks, could see the heartbeat but could not hear it, I had an ultra sound at 10 weeks, we could see the baby move, see and HEAR the heartbeat...pretty cool. I had a 3rd ultra sound for some screening purposes and that baby was rolling in circles, moving all over the place and that's when I officially fell in love. I think it really hit me at that appointment that this is really happening. I am so excited! There have been a lot of emotions this first trimester, maybe another post at another time, but right now I'm reveling in the fact that I am over filled with joy. So now it's official...I think everyone knows and I'm starting to feel okay with that. I wanted quite a bit of privacy at the beginning, but now I'm just going to enjoy it. And and now introducing my little alien...